Unhealthy Obsessions, Love, and Desires
by WaWaMakesYouHealthy
Summary: I never liked him, that much I knew.. But after everything that happened, and everything we've been through, I couldn't wait to look into those beautiful, dark, charcoaled colored eyes, or ruffling his spikey, midnight black hair. He's my best friend, but I can't tell him how I feel.. I don't want to lose his friendship.. What should I do? Is it worth the pain? T for language.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, though I wish I did :( Anyway, this is a story idea I had. I would like to continue it, but it depends heavily on the feedback received.**

Do you know what it's like to be in a war-torn world? As a cop? The days are short, the nights are long, and trying to keep your instincts on point seems like you're running a Marathon when you're out of shape, and the finish line is still so far away..

I was sitting shotgun, my partner taking the driving seat, he was going way beyond the speeding limit, but it didn't matter when your sirens were on, and your colors blared brightly, all the cars pulled over to the side, giving you an easier, and quicker route to the site that called for you. There was a shooting, it wasn't surprisig though, raids and terrorist attacks have been at an all time high. There was a bit of worry sketched on my partner's face, his brows furrowed in a hard line and the anxiety that just barely showed on his tan face was just heartmelting. He, no matter how tired he looked,somehow always made my heart jump. I knew I was infatuated with him when we were first introduced as partners. "Officer down, we need a medic!" The blaring of our speakers zoned me out of my thoughts and admiration as I felt myself sink into the seat when my partner had slammed on the gas pedal of the car, his knuckles turning bone white as he gripped the wheel.

"Izumo," My partner started, his voice laced with worry, "Don't do anything stupid." His voice was almost a whisper, I had to strain to hear it.

"C'mon now," My voice always sounded confident, so sure of myself, "I've always had your back, Kotetsu." He gave me a quick look, a glare in his eyes told me he meant what he said, '_Don't be stupid'_, meant for '_Don't be the hero_,' but i'd do anything to save him, especially when it meant being grazed by an incoming bullet.

The car jerked to a halt, and we got out as quick as possible with trained precision. The doors were open wide, and we crouched behind them, using the open window sill of the door as a balance for our wrist and pistols. There was blood on the floor, medics were rushing in, bullets flying. There was a guy, dressed in black, running away as he saw the distracted cops. 'Don't be stupid.' Kotetsu's words reverbated in my head, and I shook it off as I kicked off the ground and chased after the man dressed in black, "Izumo, stop!" I heard Kotetsu's deep voice yell after me. I sprinted harder, almost caught up with the man, before I tackled him down to the ground, landing with a thud. I quickly disarmed him and put cuffs around his wrists, when I pulled myself up, I picked him up with me, a triumphant smirk on my lips as Kotetsu came running over, his anxiety at a higher level. "Don't EVER do that," he growled. "We're partners, we stick together. You could have been wounded!"

I shook my head, and didn't say anything, he worried about me, a lot. Another cop came over and took the man away, and drove away, sirens blaring. "I had it under control," I shrugged, a small smile directed at him. I wasn't gonna lie, being reckless.. Doing those life-risking things I did everyday? It was worth it, just to see the caring and worriness etched in his beautiful, dark eyes. Those emotions he directed at me. It was crazy though, because when you love someone so much you'd do anything for them, and it killed you inside when you didn't get that love recpirocated. My smile faded when he turned around, and my eyes saught the ground. A sigh escaped my lips as I walked to the car we arrived in, teeth chewing the inside of my cheeks.

We were driving at a normal pace now, back to the station. I rested my elbow on the sill of my open window, and let the cool wind lick my pale, peachy colored skin. I put a hand through my choppy, dirty blonde hair. It normally fell just past the tip of my ear, and my bangs were normally pulled back to keep from covering my eyes. It was much harder to work when you couldn't see. I stared down at Kotetsu's tan hand on the gear changer, and occasionally, I would glance up at his beautiful, serene face, that was no longer etched in worry. His midnight black, spikey hair rustled softly with the wind that breezed softly into the car, from my open window. His eyes were glued to the road ahead, occasionally glancing at his mirrors, or at the speedometer, and the streets, searching for anything suspicious. "Want to go drinking tonight?" I asked, trying to break the awkward silence, and hear that deep voice of his.

He gave me a sidelong glance before replying, "fine," he sighed in mock defeat. I felt a smirk creeping on my face.

Drinking for us, was just a way to let loose, forget about all the shit going on in the world, and just be normal. Besides, maybe tonight would be my lucky night? I would always make a hint, beit jokes, or touches that linger a bit too long. He had to know of my feelings, or was he just that blind?

OoO

I grabbed a tank top and inspected it slightly, I was by no means afraid of my looks; I had a well built frame, and the outline of my abs coming too. I was just afraid of coming off too much when it came to Kotetsu. I was sure of my feelings, but I didn't want to drive him away if he wans't. I knew if I drove him away, I would lose a great friend. I can live with the constant pain and agonizing days of looking at something I can't have, because at least something was better than nothing, right? I swallowed a dry lump in my throat as the thought hit me. I shoved down all my insecurities and put up that confident facade up, the one where you think I had no fears, and I was invincible, because I got everyhing I needed. False.

I grabbed my keys and started the engine of my car, and sped off towards the bar, near dowtown Konoha, where hookers to cops hung out. It was one of the biggest in town.

OoO

The music was loud, pounding my ears, I liked it that way though. I weaved through the crowd looking for the man who was holding my heart, and unknownly squeezing the life out of it. I had ordered a cocktail, and sat at the bar, tired of the search. I began sipping on my drink casually. I felt a hand squeeze my shoulder blades, and my cop instincts almost kicked in until my brown eyes met those dark, almost black eyes. "Hey," he smirked.

"Hey," I grumbled, but on the inside, I was happy to see him. He had been looking for me in the club, that or I was obvious to spot. I shrugged it off and watched as he took a seat next to me. "How's everything going?" Casual talk. He heaved a sigh and shook his head, I raised an eyebrow. He had been my partner long enough to me otice changes in his mood. He was always quiet and reserved, but he looked helpeless now, and his eyes, they looked empty, tired. "Want to go outside?" I suggested, he nodded, grabbing a quick drink from the bartender before we went from chaotic, loud, bar music to the serene quiet of the night, with only the rustling leaves as our DJ. "So," I started, "What's up?" Sometimes, with people, you can't beat around the bush, and you need to be upfront with them. Kotetsu was one of those people that you couldn't leave in their own mind for too long. He was compassionate, he had a heart, and every rough situation effected us.

Another shrug of his, "Nothng," he took a drink, "I'm just so tired, Zu." My heart skipped a beat at his nickname he gave me, it always seemed to. I gulped down my fluttering heart and continued listening, "so much anger, hatred, blood spilled." A bitter laugh left his throat, it was then I smelled the alcohol on his breath, was he drinking before he even came here? I felt genuine worry for him. "And for what?" I opened my mouth to say something, but he cut me off, "money. This is stupid, pointless. I am so tired of waking up at night, hearing a kid screaming in the midst of all the chaos, calling for her mom." He took another chug of his drink, finishing it, "and her mom is out of her sight, laying in a pool of her own blood, unmoving, cold. She's just.. Gone." I saw that look in his eyes, I recognized it all too much, helpelessness, the feeling of not being able to stop the inevitable, powerless. He leaned on the wall, his eyes glistened with unshed tears, I moved closer to pull him into a hug, but he just slid down the wall, crumpling into a quietly, sobbing heap. I kneeled down and rubbed his back until he felt better. I wrapped an arm around his shoulder as he buried his face into his palms. I knew alcohol always made him emotional, but it helped keep the demons away at night. Just 'cause we were cops, didn't mean we had imperfections..

OoO

Between the alcohol and the emotional moment, Kotetsu fell asleep. He was mostly built with muscle, a very lean person, and the stresses of picking him up weren't bad. I had patted him down earlier to search for keys, and there wasn't any. He more than likely took a cab since he lived farther than I did. I fussed around for my key, before I found it, and began unlocking my car. I gently placed him in an upright position in the passenger seat before I took the driver side. I went to my house, throwing occasional glances that he was okay, before I would focus on the road itself.

It was a quiet night, and it didn't take long to get him in the guest room and sleeping. I went to my bed and laid face up, staring at the cieling, running a hand through my hair. I was one of the few people he opened up to. I was his best friend, and I had his back. My heart was doing back flips as I kept thinking of our Friendship. No matter which one of us fell down, it was the other who picked eachother up.

OoO

"Izumo," I heard a voice calling out to me.

_"I hate you! You always mess eveyrthing up!" Kotetsu yelled at me. This was our first mission together, and we weren't in sync, at all. He said I messed things up? No, he should have acted sooner!_

_ "You're the slow one! You have to be so calculating all the ti-" I yelled, only louder. I was interrupted by him shoving me against the car, I got angry, and tackled him to the ground, I raised my first to punch him until he flipped us, and he was on top of my, sitting on my chest. I never hated his guts so bad until now._

"Izumo.." It repeated, a bit more louder and more stern. I made a groan and turned over onto my side.

_We were in the captain's office, cut and bruised, but not from a mission we were sent out on. He had a look of pure disappointment. "You're partners, not an ANBU chasing a wanted criminal. Get your act together.. Or you'll be taking a vacation. Permanently." Before we could protest, he cut us off, "out of my office. Now." He left no word for argument. _

_ I was seething. This kid thought he ran the place.. I shoulder bumped him on our way back to our office._

"Izumo, you need to wake up!" It was louder, this time a hand was on my shoulder, shaking me gently.

_We were on another mission, we were both angry with eachother. He was driving. I was sulking in the passenger seat. It was another terrorist attack. We weren't thinking clearly.. There was an explosion. Most of our ANBU special forces guys took care of everything. It was a suicide mission. They wanted to take as much of us out before we took them out. It was moving in slow motion, everything was. Kotetsu and I were getting out of the car, and we were running to get cover. We were still fairly new to going on missions, graduated from our paper pushing jobs.. A man was running out, Kotetsu already had a focus, and the guy was aiming down his sight at his target, my partner. "KOTETSU!" I yelled, he gave me a look of, unsure, confused. I rushed over, the enemy pulled his trigger. The bullet was flying. I tackled Kotetsu down just as the bullet nipped my shoulder. I yelled in pain._

_ "Izumo.." Kotetsu's face was washed in horror. I felt dizzy. I was laying on my back, and he was above me, he was biting his lip, I was almost afraid he'd chew it off. He grabbed the nearest walkie talkie, and yelled, "Medic! Officer down! Off-" Everything was blurring in and out, my shoulder went numb. "Izumo, please don't go!" His voice was filled with so much sorrow._

"IZUMO!" A shove. I jolted awake, gasping for air. A dream, just another dream. I closed my eyes, but I was only met with Kotetsu's beautiful, dark eyes filled with worry looking down at my wound. "You were screaming." I was finally able to register that voice. "Are you okay?" He asked after a pause.

I nodded my head, and took a couple more deep breaths before I can look up at him, a sincere smile, that was only for his eyes to see. "I'm okay." The look he gave me, told me he didn't believe me, but he didn't push it.

"Sorry about last night. Thanks for the ride, and a place to sleep." He started, he sat at the edge of the bed, and his gaze held mine. He looked like he needed to say something, but he just waited.

"It's not a problem, i'm going to change, and shower, you can come if you want?" I said with a chuckle and a wink. Kotetsu's face turned a light shade of red as the blood rushed to his face, and he stuttered. He turned and left the room, unsure of what to say. A part of me felt shut down, and my good nature smile vanished off my face so fast. I shrugged it off, took a quick shower. Kotetsu wasn't in my apartment at all. The guest room was empty, the kitchen, the bathrooms, everything. Another hopeless feeling struck a blow through my heart.

OoO

"You need to tell him." Kakashi, the perceptive one would always say. I was at the coffee station in the office, grabbing a cup, having a moment of relaxation before I was going to give my heart hell, by seeing what I couldn't have. "It's killing you inside. You're not thinking clearly, and you're not in any mental state to go on a mission. At all. You're putting everyone else's life in jeaopardy if you're not 100% focused on the mission." He chastised. I knew he wasn't mad, but I want to hear what he had to say.

"You don't understand, Kakashi." I spat back, more anger in my tone than I hoped. I took a deep breath before I continued, "you got the man you wanted.. You had your happily ever after." I sulked. I leaned on the wall as we spoke. "It's not as easy as you're making it sound.." Kakashi only shrugged before he walked away. A sigh left my lips as I walked back to my office, our office. I saw Kotetsu leaning over a guy's desk, flaunting his good looks, it was clear the young man he was helping was flustered, I could tell by the soft pink that crept over his face. I felt my anger and jealously flare, how could he do this to me?! I almost stormed over until I caught myself, until I realized, he isn't mine.. I can't control who he speaks with. Yes, it hurt, but he wasn't mine. He's not mine, I kept repeating to myself. Kakashi was right. It did hurt. A lot more than it should.

OoO

I sat in our shared office, filing paperwork, finishing reports, anything to occupy myself. I looked up as I heard the door open up, Kotetsu walking in, a ghost of a smile on his lips. "Hey!" He spoke up, as he took a seat and placed his feet on his desk, leaning back in his chair, "so! All the guys are going out to celebrate. Wanna come?" I felt my ears heat up, he was inviting me to go? My heart skipping a beat, and my stomach was sommersaulting with pure joy.

"Uh, sure, but Kotetsu, we need to talk." My voice was weak, shaking. Kakashi's words repeated in my head, _'It's killing you inside.' _He raised an eyebrow, and waited for me to continue. I sighed, "I think we make a great team, we've been getting some great scores.." I rummaged through the stack of papers, and passed them to him.

"Really?" He raised an eyebrow as he reached for the stack of papers I handed to him, "you made it sound like you had to confess something that would make or break you."

_'I did..' _I bit the inside of my cheek, as a response quickly formed itself into my head, "well, yeah. Think about it, Tetsu," I started, "we need better scores." He scoffed, I continued, "it does make or break us, I like having a job.." I trailed off. My eyes wandered to the floor, of our office. I felt his gaze on me, so sharp and calculating. I looked up, meeting his gaze, I held back a sigh, "I'm actually going to stay back," I said, trying to mask any hurt and emotion I felt, "need to get these scores up," I chuckled.

Kotetsu moved his seat next to mine, and looked over the paperwork, "If it means that much to you, i'll stay and help out. Y'know, like a study date," he had a genuine smile that took my breath away, '_date' _the voice in my head repeated, my heart almost fluttered out of its caged chest.

"I-i-if you want," I stuttered, a blush creeping on my cheeks and across my nose bridge, I was hoping he would say yes.

He reached a hand out, before he paused, and wrapped it around my shoulder and giving it a couple pats, "sure.. Partner," his smile was replaced by a smirk and I smiled again, quiet, excited, and unsure how to react.

OoO

"This isn't right!" Kotetsu shouted, grabbing two fistsfuls of his spikey, midnight black hair as he stared at the paperwork. He was never the type of guy who was book smart, that was my domain, and he was street smart, I wasn't. We were sitting on chairs opposite of eachother, with all of our material on the medium sized coffee table. "This is so frusterating," he would grumbl. I let a chuckle escape my lips, and he pouted, then glared. "It's not so funny..." He grumbled.

This man, he was everything I wanted, and more. I ceased my amused chuckling before I let a soft smile stay on my lips. "Yeah, uh huh." I stretched and yawn, and noticed the bright, big, beautiful moon hung so high in the sky. I suddenly felt the weight of exhaustion seeping into my bones. "I'm so tired," I rubbed my eyes and got up, waiting for Kotetsu to finish what he was working on, so I could walk him out the door.

"Hey, Zu?" He started, his expresion blank as he stared at the paperwork, but he wasn't staring at the paperwork anymore, more like right through it. I waited patiently for him to continue, "can I stay here for the night?" He asked, his voice wavering with hesitance.

I stared at him as if he were crazy, he's asking to stay? He should know i'm more than okay with it, "sure.. You know you don't need to ask, right?" I paused, "you know where the guest room is, c'mon," I motioned with my head, asking him to follow. Kotetsu got up, stretched, and followed, leaving our paperwork forgotten. I watched him get situated, taking off his boots, throwing himself onto the bed, getting comfortable. It was then I noticed he was here, but mentally, he was somewhere else. I stepped closer to him, and sat at the edge of the bed, I could finally see the exhaustion, the lack of sleep from nightmares. Without thinking, I wrapped him into a hug, I didn't expect him to return the hug. It broke me when I felt his body shaking uncontrollably with sobs, I rubbed and patted his back gently. It made sense, he didn't want to be alone with all those demons. I endured the uncomfortable sitting until he had finally fell asleep. I gently rested his head on the pillow, and pulled the blanket up to his shoulders.

I went to my own bed, and sat on the edge.

_The room was white, the curtain was white.. Everything was just.. White. I tried sitting up, and groaned when I tried putting any pressure on my right arm. "Oh.." I mumbled, looked at my bandaged shoulder. I took a bullet for my retarded partner. I looked around and inspected my hospital room, and that's when I noticed him, hair more tousled than normal, his face was calm, relaxed, and not holding a frown or anything. He looked so peaceful sitting there, sleeping on the chair next to my bed. Wait.. Did he sleep here? "Tetsu," I spoke, my voice hoarse and my throat dry. "Kotetsu!" I yelled louder; he sturred gently, and I couldn't help but wonder what he was dreaming about, "Kotetsu!" My voice cracked, and my throat felt itchy as I tried to yell for him again. He opened his eyes and rubbed the sleep out, and staring into this dark, beautiful, eyes of his, it took my breath away. I knew at that moment, I was smitten. _

_ "You're okay.." He mumbled, as he rubbed the back of his neck. It was probably sore from how he slept, "right..?" His voice sounded shaky, as if he beileved I wasn't actually here._

_ I couldn't even be mad, I just stared at him, a small smile on my lips, "I'm okay, I'm here," I repeated; I took a breath, "did you sleep here?" _

_ Kotetsu nodded, and ran his hand through his black hair, "Yeah, I was so worried; you were bleeding, you passed out at the scene, I just.. I couldn't live with the thought that you died saving me. I should be the calculating one, right?" He let out a dry chuckle, refering to the argument we had at our Captain's office, "yet I almost got you killed.." This event really broke him, that much I could tell from the look on his face, "I didn't think you'd ever wake up, but that was just my fears.. Your heart rate, pulse, everything, it was all normal, and the nurses and doctors said you just needed rest. The bullet didn't impale you," he continued speaking, and I came to nejoy hearing that deep, yet soft, voice of his, "it just scraped you, not fatal or anything, it's just going to hurt like a son of a bitch until it heals. They don't even think you'll need physical therapy!" He stated happily, this was the most he's ever talked since I've known him, even to this day. I realized I had been smiling. _

_ 'I'd do it all over again, if it meant I was on your mind all the time...' my conscious whispered with desire. "Thanks.. For staying with me." It meant a lot that he stayed, to make sure I woke up. This was the turning point in our partnership, and we began to appreciate eachother more.. I guess it was because we learned that we can die at a moment's notice.. Death's hands were cold, and could come at a moment's notice._

I remember so much of our friendship.. Especially everything in the begining. All the little things he did, the way his body moved. I realized it all, and i've only grown to care about him more and more.

I awoke with the smell of bacon and eggs in the air, I stretched and sat up, Kotetsu was already awake? I rubbed my eyes and threw the covers off to the other side of the bed, I threw a loose shirt on and some baggy jeans. I looked into the kitchen and noticed Kotetsu was wearing a baggy pair of sweats, ones that looked all too much like my own, he had thrown on his shirt from last night and was cooking away in the kitchen, "Morning," I grumbled, my voice raspy, I noticed his jump from surprise as he looked at me, a mixed emotion on his face, one I couldn't quite read, and that made me uncomfortable. "Smells good," I muttered tiredly as I grabbed a ceramic cup from the cupboard and poured some freshly made, and steaming black coffee into a cup before drinking it.

"Sorry if I woke you," he started as he turned around and finished cooking. He placed the eggs and bacon evenly on two plates that already had a small stack of pancakes, "I was hungry.." He said, shrugging, "I also took your sweats while you were sleeping."

"I noticed," I started, taking another sip; I took a seat across from him and cut my pancakes into little pizza slices before pouring an unhealthy amount of syrup on it.

"You're going to get fat with all that syrup," Kotetsu said, before popping a piece of bacon into his mouth.

"It's not like I don't go to the gym, or I run a lot at work. Nope. I just like eating fat foods and letting myself go..." I said with a hint of sarcasm. The pancakes were really good, and he made the bacon with a nice cripsy twinge to it. The eggs weren't runny, and weren't disgustingly dry. It was nice, and a filling breakfast, "you cook well," I noted, he blushed in embaressment and muttered a quiet 'thanks'. I pulled out a paper and began reading, and he sat there, watching, analyzing. I peered over every now and then, and wished I could read his mind, wondering what he was thinking.

"You didn't have to..." Kotetsu started, his plate was barely touched, while mine was half gone. He began moving the eggs, pancake slices, and bacon around with his fork, as he stared absentmindly down, when I looked up at him, confused, he continued, "you didn't need to let me stay with you," he clarified, "I have an apartment of my own," he shrugged. "I just don't like being there, y'know? I just don't like being alone."

Just as I figured, he didn't want be by myself, at least not with someone he knows out there. It reminded me of when a kid was scared of monsters and their parents would chase them away. You knew someone was near to make everything better if you yelled, or screamed in your dreams. It was now or never, I had to tell him, "Kotetsu.." I stopped, he looked up, a mix of confusion, curiosity, fear, and so much more, all rolled into one. '_it's now or never...' _I let a huge sigh escape my lips, "I care about you." '_That was terrible! He doesn't know what you mean!' _My conscience screamed at me. I sucked in a breath, waiting for a response.

He raised an eyebrow, "That's... Good.." He started off, he seemed to be trying to find the right words as he continued, "I care about you too." I felt my heart leap in my chest and I released a breath I've been holding, "I mean, we're partners afterall, we're supposed to care?" He sounded unsure, confused. I felt like my world came crashing down, like I was hit by a truck (Though that might feel better). I felt like my heart was pounding into my chest, and a ton of pressure was on my sternum. It got increasingly harder to swallow that lump in my throat, and I felt my eyes watering wioth unshed tears. I was angry, hurt, and ashamed.

"Yeah, partners." I spat back, angrily. My tone was harsh, and Kotetsu recoiled as if I had physically hit him. "I'm going to get ready for work," I got up, the floor scraping on the tiled floor as it was pushed back, and I stalked off to my bathroom. I turned on the water and let it run until it was warm before activating the shower head, taking off my clothes, and stepping in. I punched the marbled wall of the bathroom as my pent up frusteration and thoughts consumed my mind. I finally let my emotions let loose under the shower's massaging water patterns.

_I was finally released from the hospital, it hurt to dress myself, so the nurses helped. Kotetsu had walked outside to give me privacy, though I wish he was the one helping me._

_ "I see the look you give him.." The nurse said softly, I gave her an incredulous look, and she continue, "you are infatuated with him," she giggles, "you're a man with great looks," she started off as her hands brushed my lean stomach when she finished pulling my shirt over my body."_

_ "Thanks," I said, an arrogant smirk on my lips, "but i'm not into woman," I shrugged, she pouted, mock hurt on her face. "I don't think he's into men though.." A frown marred my face as I looked away, deep in thought._

_The nurse had a friendly smile on her face, "just give him time; you should tell him though. You will either get closure, or a beautiful man to have in your arms." She stood arms length away, hands placed gently infront of her body._

_ The smirk softened, "I know, he's just.. I didn't feel it until recently.. He's just worried, is all. Maybe this is a whole phase thing. He and I fought all the time," I chuckled, amused._

_"Sounds like you're already a married couple," she laughed sweetly behind a hand. I couldn't help but smile, but as soon as it appeared, it vanished. _

_ "I don't want to get my hopes up." I told her flatly. "It's not worth losing a friend."_

_ She sighed, "it's better to take that leap of faith, instead of living in regret." She knew she wasn't going to get through to me, no one ever did. "He's waiting for you outside," she said simply, before she opened the door and found a patiently waiting Kotetsu. He had all my things and his in a backpack that he slung over a shoulder of his; he looked like he was lost in thought, swimming through the suggestions of his conscience, and hopefully not drowning._

_"Ready?" He suddenly said, I simply nodded my head. This was going to be harder than I anticipated._

OoO

Kakashi was sitting in his desk across from me. I was twiddling my thumbs, waiting for him to say something. I needed to avoid Kotetsu today, and Kakashi was perfect to speak with. He could butter up the captain like it was nobody's business (I'm sure it shouldn't be, too..) "I just need a mission," I shrugged, casually speaking, like nothing was up, like this morning never happened.

"Why?" He said simply. He was by no means stupid, and he can play my game better than I could.

"I just need more money to pay bills, save for vacat-"

"Shut the fuck up, Izumo." Kakashi said point blank, "I'm not an idiot." He was standing up now, his palms slammed into his desk, and he leered over it, a menacing glare on his face. "Tell me what your problem is, or else.." he left off. I heaved a heavy sigh, my chest cavity felt like it just had a building pressure, and breathing alone was a task. It hurt so bad, but I couldn't just tell someone that! I looked down at the ground, my palms were sweaty and I noted I was constantly rubbing them on my uniform pants to keep them from being too gross and sweaty. Kakashi sat there, analyzing, guessing, "he didn't feel the same," he summed up, I didn't need to nod, he could tell by the way I hung my head, shrinked into my seat, and couldn't look up at him.

"He thinks I care like a partner does." I laughed bitterly, my voice hoarse, "I couldn't tell him I cared about him more.." I continued, Kakashi's face softened, and he didn't look as menacing. He sat back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. "After he said that, I couldn't bring myself to tell him how much I really care..." I finished off, shrugging, "I came here to get a mission that I could go on alone, something that'll help me forget about him. I just need to get away," I kept repeating. Kakashi had to understand.

He was silent for a long period of time, and the silence was almost deafening.. He finally spoke up, "fine.." He heaved a sigh, "we have a high ranking mission, you will be given a partner," I opened my mouth to say something, but he raised his hand to tell me to stop, "I'll have you paired with someone else." I breathed a sigh of relief, and thanked him, I left the office without another word. I took the long way out of the building to avoid mine and Kotetsu's office. I got into my personal car and drove home, and began packing a light bag for my week long journey.

OoO

I was partnered with a girl named Ino. She was fit, strong-willed, and sarcastic. She was a pleasure to be around, and we got around great! She was like the big sister I never had. We were laying down outside of the tents, hands behind our heads, relaxing by the dying fire. We looked up at the bright stars that twinkled back at us; we didn't say much to eachother, but I was okay with that, I didn't feel like I had to talk all the time to feel comfortable.. It was silent, relaxing.

"Sometimes," Ino started softly, "when I'm left alone in silence, and my fears and thoughts become my company, that's when I get truly scared.." she paused, unsure of how to continue, "but sometimes the silence is so refreshing, because your fears make you feel alive." We fell into another comfortable silence. I pondered over what she said; it was true.

I ignored that tan face with dark eyes and spikey black hair. It seemed to resurface, but like anything that hurts us, we forget. I shoved it to the back of my mind, and enjoyed myself in this moment, with a friend who didn't needs words, or feel pity towards me.. Just another human being trying to get through the day.

OoO

Ino and I walked through the gates of Konoha, being welcomed by the guards. It had been a long week, and we were more tired than ever; we had bags under our eyes, bruises scattered over our bodies, and a little bit of feet dragging in each step. The mission was a success, not as hard as it was made out to be. Our first stop was to a hospital. It was mandatory to get a check up after a mission, especially a "high-ranking" one. Ino and I joked about, exchanging contact information as the doctors probed our bodies with needles and equipment.

"What do you have going on tonight?" Ino said, a lustful gaze crossed her bright blue, baby eyes. She flicked her golden blonde hair back behind her shoulders. I wasn't busy, but I was still going to avoid Kotetsu, at least until I could come to terms with what he felt. "You okay?" I must have looked completely zoned for her to ask.

"Yeah! Sorry." I said all too quickly, she raised a delicate eyebrow, and gave me a face that clearly said, "we're going to talk about this later."

**So I was inspired to write this story after reading another one kind of like it on here. Though the plot and the way the stories runs in much, much different, I had this nagging idea in my head, and I needed to get it out onto paper. Read and review, give me your opinions.**


End file.
